Every couple experiences a certain level of disagreement, disappointments or disconnections. Couples are prevented from seeking communication and connection because of inaccurate assumptions about marriage and long-term relationships.
It is unfortunate that the range of unrealistic assumptions and expectations about marriage and other long-term committed relationships prevent many people from seeking help. Here are the few most common myths now.
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1. Many Happy Couples don't Fight
Happy couples are the ones who know the fight, who know the limits of fights. Both partners need to self-soothe, listen with curiosity and compassion, and inquire with care, respect and self-respect in order to resolve conflict effectively. There is no such thing as happy couples not fighting, there is maturity, understanding and ability to resolve fights.
You can take the help of couple's therapy to identify which aspects of your conflict are effective and what you and your partner need to change about your relationship to cope with stress.
2. The Spark in a Relationship Eventually Fades Away
Our culture believes that any relationship loses its spark eventually. This myth leaves many couples hopeless about their future. It can be saved from going that way with proper communication, love, skills and knowledge of things from taking turns.
Our lives are busy at work, and tension about the future makes it difficult to maintain a connection with our partner, especially when our partner needs us the most. Couple counselling helps you to gain insight and learn tools to maintain good relationships consistently.
3. Relationships are Either Good or Hard to Maintain
Maintaining relationships takes some effort or teamwork. Both partners contribute equally and make an honest effort to trust and support each other. In fact, if it isn’t hard sometimes, then it’s probably not worth doing. In life what matters most is what we fight for. But the couple counsellor can help you determine whether your relationship is more difficult than it should be.
4. We Don't Need Couple Counselling, We are Happy
Each of the couples faces challenges that can lead to stagnation or personal growth. You and your partner also change over time because life is messy and full of changes and challenges. These challenges can become a wedge between you and your partner and allow you to grow individually as a couple. A counsellor can help both of you to examine the issues that feel threatening and suggest a new and more effective way to work them out.
If you are wondering if you are alone in your marriage and relationship facing difficulties, a counsellor might help you out.